Art supplies!

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Hello lovelies!

So, with the little bit of income I have from my art business I’ve reinvested into more art supplies to try. If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook you’ve probably seen this video but here it is again just in case

This was my first go at using them, I’m so used to just using pencils or digital drawing so the doodles aren’t all that great since I’m not well practiced with them, but these are really cool! This was done on printer paper so they bled more than they would on thicker paper.

This is the result of my second attempt at using these pens. The paper in this sketchbook is thicker so it worked better but the paper used in this notebook is a little “fuzzy” so blending was a tad tricky but overall, it worked pretty well! I love leatherbound sketchbooks and so far I really like the quality of this one. 

These pens will probably work well on watercolor paper but I don’t have any at the moment. As soon as I get some I’ll do a test run and try to record that as well. But for now, here’s my little post about art supplies.

If you’d like to check these pens or the journal out here are some links:

Tombow Dual Brush Pens – Portrait
Leatherbound Sketchbook

 

 

 

Adobe Spark (12)

Cabin Expansions & “DIETS”

Greetings lovelies!

Sorry it’s been awhile since my last post. I decided I would try and update everyone a little bit more in depth on here. I uploaded a video a few day’s ago on YouTube, you can check it out (PLEASE like and subscribe! it helps me out immensely!) but I didn’t go into details much so this will kind of expand on the recent happenings of everything right now.

Divorce – divorce is over, finally. I’ve learned a lot over the last 7 months of going through this…mostly about myself. I’ve done a lot of healing during that time as well, I’ve made some really amazing new friends, I’ve started using my artistic talents to start my own business, I’m strengthening my relationship with God…life is strangely amazing and I feel incredibly blessed. Sure, I have my moments, this isn’t ideal, I wanted my marriage to last, I wanted my son to have two loving parents to raise him…but you can’t force someone to love you and you can’t force them to try. If they aren’t going to put forth the effort to fix things and decide to abandon you without an explanation…do you really want to spend the rest of your life with them? loving someone who constantly had one foot out the door really took a toll on my heart. I’m still dealing with wounds from it that I’m afraid I’ll always have scars from. But I’ve learned so much through this process, about myself and the ways I could have done things different (I know I am not perfect and don’t pretend to be.) and also about allowing people to just treat me any way they want to. I’m learning to gently lay down boundaries to protect myself and others too really…and I’m thankful that the worst that could have happened, didn’t and I still pray for him. How could I not? he’s still the father of my child, no matter what happens he’ll always have some role to play in my son’s life and I just hope that he can pull himself together and be a better parent than he had growing up, for our sons sake. I know he has that potential in him because I believe most people have to potential for greatness. They just have to believe in themselves and put in the work. Life isn’t easy. Change is hard, accepting we have imperfections and need to change is hard. It’s taken a lot for me to accept my part in my past failures and process that and change my attitude. It’s easy to get caught up in how unfair everything is, but that doesn’t change anything and only keeps us stuck with no hope of getting anywhere.

So in the words of Elsa…

giphy.gif

(You’re welcome)

“Diet” – I hate that word, don’t you hate that word? that word implies I’m restricting and being denied something because of people abusing that word when really, a diet is what a creature eats over the course of their life, such as a diet of hay, grass and oats for a horse (in the mose simplistic of explanations.). When I say diet, I don’t mean “let’s give up all the foods we love and drink bone broth until we starve away the fat,” there’s so many unhealthy “diets” out there. That isn’t what I mean. A diet isn’t going to give you results, a diet is going to damage you. A lifestyle change is what everyone needs and anyone who has lost weight (and kept it off) will tell you that.

Anyway, mini rant over.

So. After the start of the downward spiral into divorce I kind of fell back into old, unhealthy eating habits. I was eating pizza, chocolate, ice cream…I was still trying not to overeat, but I wasn’t doing much physical activity since it was winter for one, but I was so unmotivated and just barely surviving emotionally. Giving my toddler the attention he needed was already hard enough, but I managed to do that and I would fall apart whenever he was asleep. I didn’t want him to see my heartache. It was rough, those first few months. Everything seemed hopeless and pointless. I’m so thankful that I got through those hard days, God is good.

I tried to get back on track a few times, but anytime I did something would happen that would send me back into bingeing on sugar. Which was terrible, I triggered three migraine attacks in a row and I knew I needed to change. So I stopped buying candy. That helped, but it wasn’t enough.

So last week I resolved to start walking again. With my artwork and writing it’s easy to sit a lot. Plus still nursing my son has me sitting a lot as well. We’ve had bears around the area I live so going jogging with the stroller isn’t that appealing right now. Hiking is harder with the threat of bears as well. So I’ve been making due with walking around the house, standing more, and doing bodyweight (and weightlifting) exercises. I’m feeling tons better.

I’m back to not eating processed foods, and eating more veggies. I’ll talk more about all that in a video sometime and go over exactly what I’ve been doing, but for now, I’m feeling SO much better. My mood swings are going away, I feel more energetic and I’m excited about the future.

Cabin Expansion – In my vlog I linked to above (and here) I mentioned how my parent’s are getting the cabin expanded.

Our cabin was originally a 16×32 log cabin made somewhere around 1965, and we built on a mudroom/entryway, bathroom and some bedrooms. Even with only a few of us still at home it still feels really small for this many people, so my parents decided to get a loan so they can expand the cabin. Since we ended up having to stay here instead of getting to move to a warmer climate we need to make life a little easier on my parents, especially during the long winter months.

(The guys working on the foundation are actually here right now working outside, it’s exciting!)

So the new addition is going to be two stories, my parents will have a good size bedroom upstairs with their own bathroom (so 5+ people don’t have to share one bathroom anymore) and the downstairs will be big enough for a workout room so we can have the treadmill and our weights and plenty of space for hula hooping! this is going to make winter so much easier to deal with.

This also means that I will be getting my “own” room (I’ll still be sharing with Tavo, obviously). Which means that vlogging will be ten times easier because I will have enough space to have a little “vlogging corner” and more privacy to film something. I’m hoping to get on a schedule where I get one video and one blog post out every week, so two entries basically every week. Theoretically. I’ll keep you posted!

My Art Business – Chances are you’ve already seen some of my work that I’ve posted online, but I’m starting to work from home as a logo designer/artist (Maybe I should just say Graphic Artist? since I don’t just do logos…). I’m slowly and steadily growing my client base, it’s mostly through word of mouth and the little bit of outreach I have with my social media accounts, but it’s a start! I’m super excited. It’s amazing to be turning something I’m passionate and have a talent for into a living. Such an incredible journey to be on and I’m so ridiculously thankful to people putting their trust in me and everyone being so utterly encouraging. I am beyond blessed.

Well, those are the major highlights of what’s going on in my little corner of the world. I hope everyone is doing well! if you have any ideas for blog posts you would like to have me write or videos you think I should make, please comment or message me! I’d love to hear from you.

x

 

Glorious Clumsiness

Hello lovelies!

It’s been awhile. I’ve been busy with life and trying to figure out what ‘life’ even is at this point.

But, I had a bit of a revelation today and wanted to share because I found it pretty interesting.

So, I have always been a bit clumsy.

While I don’t trip constantly or anything I have a tendency to bump into things and drop things. There are times when I do trip, especially if I’m deep in thought or in the middle of a conversation, and sometimes I catch things that I drop, other times I don’t.

Mainly this happens because there are just too many things going through my brain all at once, trying to multitask and think of all the things I need to do or have to do so I wind up moving too fast and dropping or bumping into something.

I thought I had outgrown my clumsiness because for the last (nearly) five years I have been much less clumsy. I think I’ve dropped a cup or plate maybe two or three times in that whole time. So I thought I had outgrown my clumsiness.

WRONG.

Within the last two weeks I have accidentally dropped three coffee cups, a bowl (two of which broke), slipped and fell while hiking and wound up with random bruises from bumping into stuff that I don’t even have a memory of doing.

Then, this morning, I poured myself a cup of coffee; got it all fixed the way I like it and set it on the counter before stepping away to finish something else.

I don’t know how it happened but I moved too fast and the cup missed the counter and fell, spilling coffee all over the floor. Thankfully, it didn’t break.

I started to get frustrated because; SPILLED COFFEE (*cries*) and also feeling insanely clumsy and I haven’t felt that way in so long and was slightly embarrassed even if it was only me in the room anyway.

But then I realized something. For the last five years, maybe I haven’t been clumsy but I also haven’t been very artistic or creative.

I had spurts of it, but not like now.

I was discouraged, I didn’t sing, I didn’t draw hardly ever because I just never was in the mood for it, I was bored constantly, I rarely sat and read anything, everytime I tried to pray I felt disconnected from God, I never played my guitar because I felt like it was twangy and after a few comments about my voice being “screechy” I never wanted to sing again anyway, so what was the point in playing guitar? basically, I became hollow and all the things that were part of who I am, suffered.

But now. NOW…

Now, I’m singing daily. Drawing more. Laughing more. Reading more. Praying more. Playing my guitar. I WROTE A SONG.

I am finding myself again.

And with that, my clumsiness is returning.

It may not be the most amazing feature, but to me it’s a sign that I am healing. I’m returning to myself. I haven’t seen this girl in so long and I just started laughing and then crying kneeling there in a puddle of spilled coffee.

I hadn’t realized how much of a hollow shell of myself I had become. I had moments and echos of my artistic, creative self, but I was so numb. I was apathetic. I hid my passion and tried to let it die because I had no way of letting it shine and now I’m feeling emotions again like it’s the first time and it can be overwhelming some days, but it make’s me happy.

As much stress as I have in my life right now, I just can’t believe how insanely blessed I am.

So the next time you start to get discouraged by being clumsy, just think about how amazing it is to have so much going on in your head that you rush because you’re just trying to get as much out of life as you can. Sure we may need to slow ourselves down sometimes, but there is nothing wrong with you. You’re just you, and that is beautiful.

God IS good.

All the time.

 

gloriousclumsiness

Lawsuit?!

Hello lovelies,

Some of you have probably heard that Younique has sued our CEO Chris Welch. I won’t go into details because I don’t know much, there has been some misinformation spreading around lately so here is what we were told:

Company Announcement

Dear Maëlle Mentors,

Since our inception, we have experienced incredible success. In less than a year, we have built a brand we love, grown to more than 7,000 strong in five countries and brought over 20 innovative, high-quality products to market. All of this has provided you, our Mentors – the lifeblood of our business – with a compelling platform to build incredible teams, establish lifelong friendships, and create lasting success. The last 12 months have far exceeded our expectations, and we are so grateful to each of you for helping make it a reality.

Today, however, we are extremely disappointed to report that, due to a legal dispute with Younique, we are required to temporarily suspend direct selling on our platform for up to five months. We believe the claim against Maëlle is baseless, unwarranted and unfair.

We will not let a minor setback like this get in the way of achieving our ultimate objective, and neither should you. The entire Maëlle Team remains deeply committed to the continued success of the business and our Mentors. Over the coming months, you may ask yourself occasionally if staying with Maëlle is the right decision. We sincerely hope that the answer continues to be a resounding yes! You are each an integral part of the Maëlle family and we believe the future is very bright.

Now let’s talk about where we go from here. We’ve learned a lot over the past several months and have heard your feedback. We will use this time to make Maëlle even better than before, including “founder” status and associated incentives for all returning Mentors, a new and improved compensation plan, an exciting event and incentive trip strategy and, of course, even more beautiful products!
We are in the process of transitioning our website into maintenance mode, but we will come back to you soon with approved methods for you to retail product to your customers, outside of direct selling. Below are a few items to note:

  1. This is a company issue which will not legally affect you personally.
  2. All month-end commissions from January will be paid by February 15thas planned. Any overrides on Personal Sales will also be paid by February 15th.
  3. We will communicate regularly to ensure you are updated at all times, but please don’t hesitate to reach out directly or through our support team. We are available to answer will make sure we are available to answer questions and address potential concerns.

From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for your trust, commitment and tireless effort.

#Maëllefamily

Yours,
The Maelle Team

I will keep everyone updated! I’m sorry for the inconvenience, obviously this is not ideal for any of us, but thankfully I have other ‘irons in the fire’ as far as working from home goes and will update everyone on those later!

Until then, thank you all for your support. We stand united and we aren’t going anywhere x

Letting Go

Hello lovelies!

I’ve been trapped in my own brain a lot lately, thinking so much that I feel like my brain may explode.

I have realized that while I’m not necessarily a super organized planner, not knowing my future is really irritating me.

The uncertainty of my life right now is weighing heavily on my spirit and I am trying desperately to let go and trust that God will work everything out according to his purpose.

I’m sorry for being so vague, but I really don’t want to go into details about such personal matters right now. I’ve already had people making assumptions from what I’ve already said. People will think whatever they like I guess and ‘haters gonna hate’. I’ve been accused of posting too much of my personal life online which I find hilarious because while I do share a lot, I certainly do not share everything (to the benefit of my accuser I may add.) There have been many episodes behind the scenes that probably will never be released.

This blog has helped me through so much of my life these past few years. I’m not going to give it up now when I desperately need something stable to cling to.

In general I’m doing fine, when I’m busy I’m great. Joktavious helps me everyday by continuing to be the happy (albeit sometimes obstinate) toddler that he is. Its just the quiet moments, between falling asleep and waking up where my mind starts racing again with all the what ifs and fears.

Surrendering to God and releasing the need to know what is going to happen is such a hard thing. But I know I can do it. I may cry, I may be broken, I may be accused of things I haven’t done, but in the end, I will survive because I know who I am and to whom I belong.

I appreciate all your prayers and support. You are all so amazing, I am excited for certain aspects of my future that I do know, such as growth in my business. Everything going on right now with Maëlle is amazing and I am so thankful to be a part of this amazing company!

New YouTube Channel

Hello lovelies!

I apologize for not having a post for a bit, life has been kinda crazy. I will catch you all up later. But I managed to finish putting together my first makeup video!

I’ve started a new YouTube channel, I’m going to be consistently making videos for; moving away from the blogging to videos, really. I’m excited but also nervous. This year is going to be way different for me in a few ways. Anyway, here is the video, please go subscribe to my channel and check out the video! Give me a thumbs up if you like it

Glammin Mama’s Simple Makeup Look

Sunshine Blogger Award!

Hello lovelies!

I am honored to have been nominated by Christian J. Evans for….

THE SUNSHINE BLOGGER AWARD

This is my first ever blogger award so I’m pretty excited! I hope you enjoy the questions and answers! I seriously love the community here on wordpress.

“The Sunshine Blogger Award is given to those who inspire and bring sunshine into the lives of their readers and fellow bloggers.”

  1. Do you believe in giving people second chances?
    1. For the most part, yes. But it depends on the situation. A lot of the time I will give a person a second chance, but as I said, it depends on the situation. If they are truly sorry I’ll forgive them and we’ll move on, if it happens more than once then I normally back off. I always forgive, but there is a difference between forgiving and being friends again. Sometimes some people just aren’t meant to be in your life anymore and I choose to let go in those situations. (was that too heavy? haha sorry)
  2. Would you give your life for someone else you didn’t know if it saved theirs?
    1. I would. I am willing to give my life for anyone, I know where I’m going when I go, but who knows where that person’s heart is. Yes, it would be unfathomably heartbreaking to leave my husband and son, but when it comes down to it, I’d save another life in a heartbeat if it was needed.
  3. Is there a difference between ‘being in love’ and ‘I love you’?
    1. Yes, I believe there is a difference. I’m in love with my husband, but I love my son, it’s two different loves. Equally as strong, but still different.
  4. Have you ever been bullied, if yes, when and why?
    1. Yes, a few times, mostly online, a couple in person. My beliefs, breastfeeding, things that happened in my past. The online stuff is mostly harassment more than bullying, I suppose but still.
  5. Do you believe in life after death?
    1. Yes I do believe in life after death, you either go to heaven or hell. Choose your eternity wisely! haha
  6. If given a chance to, would you have taken a different path in life?

    1. Yes, I could have avoided a LOT of stressful issues had I chosen differently when I was younger. But at the same time I love where I am right now, I think thing’s would have turned out just as well had I not experienced some of the hardships I did, but I have chosen to let go and move on with my life. I love my life!
  7. Could you kill someone to save your own life?
    1. I would avoid it if I could, but yes. If I were being attacked I think I could. I would attempt to disarm/wound them and get away instead though.
  8. What would you do if you knew tomorrow we would all die?
     1. I would be a basket case praying for some of my family members to find the right path before then.
  9. If the world was rid of all of its clothes and we had to walk around nude, how would you manage?
    1.
    uhhh, hide! haha 
  10.  Do you blog for recreation or for work?
    1. both! I love blogging, but I also use it as a way to support my business.

HERE ARE MY NOMINEES

  1. https://hellovulnerability.wordpress.com/
  2. https://beautybeyondbones.com/
  3. https://praisehimsite.wordpress.com/
  4. https://becomingmotherblog.com/
  5. https://michelleludlow.wordpress.com/
  6. https://weightlosswarblog.wordpress.com/
  7. https://marilynnsfiberartfarm.com/
  8. http://2cupkindofmorning.com/
  9. https://cassiellensecretstory.wordpress.com/
  10. http://sparklecatinalaska.blogspot.com/

Here are my questions for the nominees: 

  1. Do you believe in giving people second chances?
  2. Would you give your life for someone else you didn’t know if it saved theirs?
  3. Is there a difference between ‘being in love’ and ‘I love you’?
  4. Have you ever been bullied, if yes, when and why?
  5. Do you believe in life after death?
  6. If given a chance to, would you have taken a different path in life?
  7. Could you kill someone to save your own life?
  8. What would you do if you knew tomorrow we would all die?
  9. If the world rid of all of its clothes and we had to walk around nude, how would you manage? 
  10. Do you blog for recreation or for work?

adobe-spark-9

Comfort zones 

Hello lovelies!

Sorry for no post on Monday, lately I’ve been busy with emotional recovery and the Maëlle Launch which has been an amazing experience as well as fantastic distraction.

I’m so glad that I have this at this time in my life, I am learning so much about myself and growing so much it’s unbelievable. 

This weekend a few members from The Matsu Women in Business group I’m in traveled to Fairbanks for the Winter Expo. These ladies are all in my Maëlle tribe and we walked around the event together networking and getting to know other ladies in business in Fairbanks.

I am learning so much from all of these ladies. I am a very introverted person normally, so I’m slowly getting out of my comfort zone and learning to connect with others. That’s one thing I love about this business and being in this group of ladies, I don’t feel pressured to get out of my comfort zone, I feel inspired to get out of my comfort zone. I don’t feel forced at all, it just comes easier than I realized, it’s really hard to explain but I’m totally loving it.

I can’t wait to get my starter kit and start playing with the makeup! This is all so exciting.

If you haven’t checked out the products on my Maëlle site yet go check it out! I have a party going on for another day or so if you want to purchase anything.

Monday (which would be today as you’re reading this) we are taking my sister Katherine in to Anchorage to go see Rick Riordan. She is so excited! He is her favorite author, it’s so awesome he gets to come here to Alaska and speak about his new book. So glad she gets this experience.

Sorry this is just thrown together and short but I’m writing this at 9pm after a 6hr long drive and I’m exhausted so goodnight lovelies! X

Moving Forward 

Hello lovelies 

So, for those that follow me on Instagram or Facebook you know that I did in fact lose the baby.

It’s heartbreaking and September was an insanely rough month for me. Especially the last few weeks.

I feel like I was preparing myself for the worst when I first started having issues, so I think that helped me absorb the reality of what was happening. I’m still upset. Still bleeding. I just want it to be over because at the moment it’s a constant reminder of my loss.

So, I’m pretty sure what happened was I really was 11 weeks pregnant but the baby stopped growing at 5 weeks, so that’s why the confusion happened with the ultrasound. My body still thought I was pregnant until it realized I wasn’t and started the whole process.

So. Yeah.

I had never wanted to experience this loss again. It’s the worst emotional pain I’ve ever been put through. I was so excited to have another baby and then that baby was just ripped from me.

I know everything happens for a reason and I’m doing okay, but it’s hard when you’re already connecting with this little life and you find out that the place you thought would be the safest place for them isn’t.

It’s  just sad. Nothing will ever change that. Not even time.

So, now I have two angel babies that I will get to meet when I get to heaven.

Like I said I’m holding it together pretty well, considering. Focusing on other things, which is easy with the launch of my company and already having a toddler. Kind of takes up a lot of time and energy so that’s a good distraction. Joktavious really has helped even with all his toddler tantrums he’s been throwing lately he brings so much joy into my life and I’m so thankful for my little man.

Jonathan gets home Wednesday. This rotation has felt like an eternity. It’s been really hard on both of us, having to be apart while processing all of this emotion. I’ve stayed over at my parents house every night because I don’t want to be alone for fear I would just completely fall apart.

But I’m moving forward, laying around feeling sorry for myself won’t change anything and will just slow down my future so I’m taking it one step at a time but still moving forward.

Anyway. I just wanted to give you all an update. I really am okay and eventually I’ll be better, and I’ve been overwhelmed by all the support from everyone. You are all amazing and I’m so thankful for each and every one of you.

How appropriate is it that October is pregnancy and infant loss awareness month? Sigh